I have two new nightly goals that I want to strive for, every single night.
I know, I know. It's friggin' stupid how easy this is.
Let's get into why these are difficult for me though, and why they will make such a big difference.
Putting down the phone is hard for two main reasons: my husband and my mother.
- My husband works long hours and it's always possible he will be several hours late coming home. It just happens in his job. I generally try to keep an eye on my phone so I know whether he has left yet, mostly for my own peace of mind and scheduling purposes (if he gets out at a regular hour, I can start dinner later and wait on him to help me give the baby a bath...if he's late I need to plan extra time for doing the bedtime routine alone, etc).
- My mom tries to Skype at least once a week...and I feel really bad if I miss her asking (this is not necessarily her fault- I accept this as my penance for living far away and gladly pay it to not be in my hometown).
I'm considering trying to hook up my bluetooth so I can hear specifically if either of these special people call or text, but this requires a few extra minutes and I need too ensure all other sound notifications are turned off my phone.
This will make a huge difference because I can focus only on what is actually physically going on around me. It releases some of the mental burden by taking one extra ball out of the air.
Plus if I am focused on all the things I can do, I'm not sitting staring at the phone worried and procrastinating about what I might be able to do if no one calls or everyone calls at the same time, or just weeding out all the random not-at-all-a-priority notifications the iPhone sends. Both of these people will live if I take a few extra minutes to respond to them.
Basically I am a better mother, wife, and overall person when I am not constantly listening for the phone and mentally managing all the notifications.
On to goal #2: while I am ALL about my Bullet Journal during the day at work, I can often leave it in my bag at home. This is mainly because I'm scared to leave it at home by accident and not take it with me to work the next day.
But I need it at night. I've always been a list/note taker, and the reason I have stuck with the bullet journal for several months is because it allows me to put ALL the random things I think of in one spot. Appointments, grocery lists, blog topics, whatever- it goes in the BuJo.
And my random thoughts don't stop just because Babycakes is in the room or I'm cooking dinner- in fact, those are the times I need it the most because there is no way a random thought will stick around longer than five seconds.
Pretty much anyone who is not a solitary spinster can relate- you get home and your kids or partner or pet or parents or whoever inhabits your home with you starts taking up your mental energy and time. And that's FINE- it's part of the beauty of having a family. But it doesn't mean that tomorrow you won't be out of deodorant or need to email someone. So I want to note it in the BuJo and quickly get back to whatever I'm doing.
Yes, I could make notes on my phone. But truthfully, my phone does TOO MUCH. It is how I talk to people and how I keep notes and how I entertain myself. I don't want to be the parent who is constantly on her phone- I hate it when Tank is on his all the time. It's too easy to reach for it for a note and end up on YouTube or some other thing that should NOT be a priority over my child (or husband or homework or home).
Keeping my notes in my BuJo is faster and easier for me personally anyway, plus it allows me to better demonstrate to my child what my priorities are (our family and needs rather than Facebook- she isn't going to know the difference in what I'm doing on my phone, just that I'm on it). Plus, if I look at my phone for five seconds Hubs automatically looks at his and then we are two losers on our phone. NO. NO NO NO. I'm tired of it and my eyes hurt.
To be clear, if you do or don't do any of the things mentioned in this post- good for you.
What works for one person does not always work for others. I get that. This is not me trying to make anyone feel guilty, or working from guilt that anyone else has caused me to feel.
I'm just trying to identify my priorities in life, and then identify what takes away from those and what enhances them. These two goals will allow me to weed through what I don't care about and remember the little details that I do care about.
Doesn't that sound lovely?
