Putting Effort in Physical Appearance

Trying to title this was difficult. I'm not sure how to sum up what I want to talk about in one snazzy little line, so I'm just going to jump right in. 

For many years, I did not like make-up. 

It felt like a waste of time, and I never felt like I was doing it right.

I had a very minimal make-up routine...and still felt like it sucked. I even went without make-up for a little while as kind of an experiment to see if anyone noticed or how I felt.

I tried using just BB cream. I tried using just powder. I never really gave up on mascara though- I feel as though I look sleepy if my lashes are in their natural state.

My feelings have changed lately. 

Rather than feeling like make-up is something I have to do, I've actually wanted to put forth an effort.

I've been trying to pinpoint what prompted this change...and I can't really put my finger on it.

Maybe it's something to do with having a baby...but "because of the baby" feels like a cop-out. Lots of people use that "excuse" for everything (because you can...seriously, such a good excuse).

All I know is- I've wanted to put some effort into my appearance lately.

And I'm enjoying it. 

Game-changer: using BB cream and then foundation.

It actually lasts all day when I do this, y'all.

Also, making sure to wash my face morning and night. SOMETIMES I GET TIRED AND DON'T WANNA. But I'm doing it anyway. Before I always thought my face broke out due to make-up...turns out you just need to take care of your skin in general. Who knew?

I'm also using whitening mouthwash. And wearing earrings on a regular basis.*

For years, it hurt to wear earrings. They would get red and irritated starting around hour 4. Thanks to Pinterest, I now clean with rubbing alcohol and use Vaseline and I can wear them ALL DAY. 

I think it has something to do with the need to practice self-care.*

Ugh, what an annoying Millennial statement. 

There's been a lot of...not good stuff going on lately- both personally and as a nation.

Well that's not accurate- personally it's not so much that there's a lot of bad stuff, just more that we've been super busy. I don't have the time to fold my laundry or make a great dinner...so taking a minute to do my mouthwash or 10 minutes to do my make-up gives me some semblance of control and being cared for.

However insignificant or shallow it may seem to be, I'm making myself and my appearance a priority for 15 minutes a day. 

That can make a world of difference in my personal mindset.

And maybe it's not important to really figure out why. 

Maybe all that matters is that I'm having fun and doing what I want and feeling good about myself.

What are your thoughts when it comes to make-up/jewelry/physical appearance? 

Have they changed over the years?

Daily Habits

Since the little one arrived a few months ago, there have been some changes in my household. I knew this was going to happen, because it's inevitable.

This isn't me complaining at all- I love being a mom, it's awesome, my kid is super cool (although talking about how much I love her just feels...icky- can we just assume I like her and I'm happy and not get into mushy weird emotional territory? Kthanksbye).


But being responsible for someone else has made me realize...I am barely keeping it together to take care of myself!

Organization and planning sound sooooo boring and uncool. But here's the thing- otherwise, nothing gets done ever.

All that stress and anxiety you feel? Probably because you don't know where the hell any of your clothes or dishes are.*

*Anxiety and depression are serious mental conditions and you should absolutely get help if you suffer from them- but I know many people who use these terms flippantly and what they really mean is "I can't be bothered to care ahead of time so my basic idleness creates mild chaos in my life." This is the type of "anxiety" I am referring to in this particular instance.

I think I can really bring my stress level down by doing a few specific things each day.

AM:
-Make my bed
-Stretch
-Brush my teeth (Yes I sometimes get busy and skip, I know but it happens)
-Drink a full glass of water 


PM:
-15 cleaning rush
-Go over my (sadly neglected) bullet journal
-Read a book before bed instead of looking at my phone
-Drink a full glass of water


If I can manage to get into these habits, there are a few more I'd like to work on also:
-Monthly meal planning
-Setting out my outfits for the week
-Setting out Pumpkin's outfits for the week

I've done these in spurts and I know they are helpful. But they require getting ahead of schedule and I spend so much time playing catch up- hoping my time off at the holidays will help get me where I want to be.

Monthly Recommendations: Family Focus

Finally! A Monthly Recommendations theme that I can actually provide good recommendations for ;) Over the past few months I've enjoyed the link-up but it just hasn't been my wheelhouse.

I almost forgot, Monthly Recommendations is a Goodreads group from Kayla  [Kayla Rayne] and Trina [Between Chapters]. They pick monthly topics and we all link-up...it's fun and you should do it too!

Family Focus

The Lunar Chronicles

I've only read the first 2 books of The Lunar Chronicles, Cinder and Scarlet. These are sci-fi, steampunk-y stories but contains complex characters and family relationships. As a retelling of Cinderella, Cinder obviously deals with step-family relations. But there is also the relationship of Prince Kai and his father, which includes a royal legacy and responsibility. Scarlet is a retelling of Little Red Riding Hood- there is a wonderful relationship with her grandmother, plus an interesting dynamic between the pack of "wolves" she ends up with.

Delirium

On basically the exact opposite end of the spectrum, Delirum involves a society where they have developed a "cure" for love. People are matched with a future spouse in their early teens, shortly after receiving the serum. The cure prevents them from loving not only their spouse, but their parents/siblings/and even children. Any sign of love or basically happiness at all is frowned upon, even criminal. It's not implicitly stated, but basically apathy is the goal. Apathetic people don't fight or fuss or rebel or care.

Secret Daughter

This book is one of my favorites that I've read this year. It follows different family members surrounding an adopted baby girl- the child, her birth mother, her adoptive mother, her adoptive grandmother...it examines culture and love and family and I just love love love love it.

The Light Between Oceans 

This is almost similar to Secret Daughter...but with some big differences. It made me cry and think and my heart bled for two families, but mostly for a little girl caught in the middle. To be perfectly honest, I did not like the ending...but overall it did a great job of showing emotional gray areas.

13 Little Blue Envelopes

 This was such a cute book. It involves a teenage girl and her unusual aunt...I like that it examined an important relationship with someone outside the immediate nuclear family. It's important to realize the importance of having someone to vent to.

What Alice Forgot

Another one of my favorites for the year. Alice wakes up one day thinking she is 29, newly married, and pregnant with her first child. Turns out she hit her head and is actually 39, in the middle of a divorce, and has 3 kids. It's wonderful and heartbreaking and wonderful again.

Lola & The Boy Next Door

Lola has two gay dads. They are great parents...but the real reason I like this book is because she has a very awkward and uncomfortable relationship with her birth mom. The birth mom is NOT made out to be a hero...which I like.

For the same reason, plus what it's like to love someone with mental illness, try Fangirl by Rainbow Rowell.

  

The Song of Acadia series

This series is a little cheesy at times (Christian fiction) but involves a desperate mother's love and the duty of friendship.

The Prince of Tides

I just love Pat Conroy. This is a dark story (trigger warnings for abuse, child & sexual) but so good.


I believe families are messy, because people are messy. And it's love and commitment and time and shared experience that make a family- these stories reflect that.

What are your favorite family-centered stories?